Scratching my itch

As most that follow my blog will know I got pretty sick a few weeks back with what doctors thought was hand, foot and mouth virus and was back and forth to hospital to have injections of antibiotics . Turns out I just get an outbreak of the rash every time I get stressed or anxious . Like a dermatitis So do I cut these things out as I’m obviously allergic !!! Point in case has been the last two days …. Spent relaxing in the city , great food and shopping and BOOM ON CONTACT… From the other side of the world I start scratching ..
He makes me anxious as i worry as to whether the message will be cutting or telling me how proud he is that I am doing what he asked of me.
He makes me sad but I know that is of my own doing. So I suck it up and try it to scratch . I live in gloves but come summer time I’m fucked !!!
I was healthier when I was on meth !!! But since meth left my life along with Sir I am falling apart .
So which one is it that my body needs and craves???? And being without which of these is making me sick???
I know that worrying will just make things worse but the thought of no contact stresses me even more .
I’m falling apart and the one person that can put me back together doesn’t have to anymore .
Hopefully my appointment with a skin specialist can solve it for me or at least ease the itch but until then it’s gloves and stockings for me .



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